Right.

I can count on my parents to point out the negatives in my life. sometimes the positive too. But mostly that which I would rather not look at. My dad is taking a flash light and shining it in my face at 4am while I'm sleeping. That's what this feels like.

Long live chaste relationships. That's all I've got to say for myself. I'm not in the mood for processing but know that that is exactly what I need to be doing in some way. Maybe I should go to Mills and play the piano in my practice room for a while. Or something.

I want to start a list called "Things You Could Not Pay Me To Do..." So far everything that's made the list has to do with alcohol and certain social groups in the San Francisco scene.

I'm not sure what I am so upset about right now. Perhaps a blanket statement of 'all the above'. I'm upset because of everything, I'm low energy, I don't want to deal. How, pray tell to get out of this funk? Mills is calling but so is a bowl of cereal. We are currently trying to get out of the habit of eating to mask feelings. Why the fuck does feeling feelings have to feel so shitty? Embrace this present moment in all it's shittiness, Joy. Haha. That is a funny sentence to look at, because my name is Joy. Annnnywhooo.