abide

remembering all my past futures. my loves bring me back. my voice gone quiet these days as the external realm picks up. developed a silence to quell the mental and physical anxiety. cultivate again an inner smile but at the moment my mother dwells. we must send her, kali, back back back. let the girl shine! oh her shadow, oh oh her shadow.

by you i abide, my grace. in this lifetime or another. each finds me again. but in these times are we to love as deeply. our settings now geared toward the fleeting and superficial. but to know again our lives and sink into skin i have known before and before and before. shape shifters. geometric objects. hurl around my diurnal psychosis. the trade off i have made for creating a symbolic exterior. when in the company of others, vibrant, confident, happy. on my own, first thing in the morning: contrast. all that which i do not let live by the light of day faces me in the mirror. until cleansed by meditation, exercise, bathing, mirror gazing, and the shadow is packed away.

the shadow wants attention, will not be masked or polite. will not bow to the whims of the artist. who is in control? my muse i refuse.

the karma i share with my others. our intricate connections. met abai randomly who also creates with noah. noah works with david and me. david and i work together. david found the satya yuga collective then i found satya yuga through abai. and also of the satya yuga, cayote, who i met two years ago on halloween when my voice first opened a channel. and odd, no 'coincidence' that the other day i was trying to determine who's spirit noah reminded me of and i thought of cayote who i hadn't seen since last july at belden, then a week later reappears into the plot line. i have never given him my number. met only twice and each time i am afraid of our connection and it's potential. like looking back through a mirror backwards and seeing all my past and futures. like staring into an abyss. it seems our story is not done. maybe it is. maybe it isn't. maybe it begins. maybe it is done.

i have far less attachment to any of them now. we are bound by nothing, by trust, by knowing.

and everyone seems to know about me. and the Pleiades.

and i'm trying to remember when that came into my consciousness for the first time. and from where. even my father, devout as he is to dogma, seemed pleased to know my new spiritual name gifted by Djin: Pleiades Aquarian. and as i mentioned parallel realities he said "resistance is futile" and i wonder if he's just fucking with me. he's not supposed to know about these things. he's supposed to uphold the church and the doctrine of father/son/holy spirit and that is it. he is supposed to remain a bastion of normalcy in an otherwise chaotic see of transubstantiation, psychic realms and altered states.

i let go. i give over. for the highest good.

green growth

the trees call. we feed them with our energy. they need our ritual. they need our love. it is how it has been since before we could speak. our green friends remember the importance of shakti on a harvest. now no one but my brothers will suffice. muggles cannot see spirit, do not know the dance as we. it is funny these things i know before i know them. weeks or months before i understand intellectually i will write of something in another form. and then the light comes on. i'm remembering this life experience from a dream. it is a dream. i am a dream. i've had this dream before. the pieces come together. they fall away. there is no doing there just is. each moment exact. i wonder sometimes if the causality of choice has any bearing on the outcome or if it really is all predetermined.

there is a sense of relief in knowing it is all taken care of. the road unfolds before me and i do not have to decide.

i love my brothers. they are a part of me. bound by psychic connection and our mutual flow. sharon says it is our karma together.

it is our love of the spirit and our shared reverence for love, community, and light to which i am drawn. it is a drug, to be praised as a goddess. not in a removed sort of way, 'hey baby you're a goddess'. but in a real, energetic sense. they know my power. they need me and other temple priestesses like me to ensure that they are fruitful. mama earth needs our female kundalini shakti to stay young.

i like being around those who are magical. i like when things happen, like going to the beach and having every other piece of land for miles have clouds and wind except for the house i am at but we have sun and the wind stops right when i get there.

it's all illusion anyway so it's not really that huge of a stretch for the clouds to part and the sun to start shining when i arrive. i could in theory create any sort of thing to happen if i went about it in the right intention...

i love you me us.

Le Lumineux

To know a marked difference, deference.
A soft eye translated
into a simple care
A sacred air;
Sacrament of diurnal cadence.

Our day at dawn
Sparked interstellar upsurge.
Pleiadian exchange granted,
there in transfer;
Centrifugal dynamism.

Seven sisters, and Isis all mine.
Her sons returned.

Corporeal one
flits in, granted.
Surrendering a stance
given to embody
yet not subsumed.

Her clarity wants
for nothing.
In Nothing
I am found.

A space holds
and process dissolves,
heeds a readiness;
Steel within resonance.

We of behind veil
alighted from submersion
Exalted;
evaporate resistance.
Anointed and given
Cellular mesh;
Psychic adhesion.

A growing legion
beyond distance or treason.

We are here bare,
Here we are two regarded,
Engendered,
departed,
Returning.

It is our mark
It is our mission.
Warrant One, Seraph
A singular vision.

Build.
Release.

Illuminating,
Raising fortune.

A gilded path;
Our expansion.

//

and the rain falls...

In the Garden

pretty bird chirping, sun rising, heart smiling perfect forth and fifth soaring long tones. recorded at Rumbo 5/1/10 with the Human Experience

I see your beauty

I see your light

When I look through your eyes

My heart takes flight

You are my reflection

You are my light

When we walk together

It makes us right

We walk through the valley

We walk through the night

Now in the distance

We hear a battle cry

I am you

You are me

All our intention

All our might

Here in our hearts

The dawn relights

We release our attachments

We release our strife

Here in the garden

Vessels of light

You are my sunshine

You are my bright

Everyday together we spend

Building our life

I am you

You are me

We are free

We are free

We are free

lullaby

i see our reticence

a penchant for their violence

i want sedition

but given silence

i hear their suffer sirens

can tell you know you are it

they took us out to lunch

we sold our souls

for a convenience

on the way out

that's what i tell my kids there's

a way out

a day away,

oh wait

too hard, oh no

i see their vision

expansion on their malice

they use religion

and garner tyrants

welcome to the

empire of mass deception

walk and wander

under stars and stripes

of Manipulations

again the servants try

to seek the guarded

tear and binded

sycophant, it's so divided

it's time to say goodbye

and sing their lullaby

i'll sing their lullaby

it's our complacence

that gives permission

consume our substance

makes us submissive

i see the end of their myth

can tell you know you are it

we take our final punch

desert our gold

and greet our brothers

that's the way out

make amends, bridge the difference

it's our way out

it's a day away,

there's a way